Feline Lessons in Life and Dance

Those who know me are well aware that I lost my dear cat Willa over the summer.  She was a petite and sassy gal who moved with such deliberate steps that we felt her walk needed its own soundtrack.  My husband used to joke that she would curl up and vibrate with the frequency of the Universe because her stare was so intense and her personality much larger than her small frame.  As the months passed, our raw grief was replaced by a quiet empty feeling and the occasional laugh over our favorite Willa memories.  I grew even closer with my remaining cat, Satchmo.  His grief seemed to trump my own and he wailed every night until he had no voice left.  Little by little, he resumed his normal behavior but was never quite the same after Willa’s passing.

We got Satchmo in November of 2000.  He quickly showed us what a true character he was, in addition to being totally fearless.  He could climb anything, jump anywhere, and had a huge enthusiasm for life and for us.  We called him “Big Love” because there was nothing that made him happier than showing affection to my husband and I.  He lived on our shoulders and would fall asleep staring into our eyes. . .literally hugging us with his paws.  Sadly, we lost him just over a week ago.  It seemed the stress of losing his best feline friend, coupled with years of chronic asthma, was too much for his lungs.  We tried everything to save him, and it broke our hearts to say goodbye.  The sadness has been tremendous.

People might be quick to point out all of the major problems in the world (natural disasters, genetically modified food, poverty, stagnant economy, antibiotic resistance, etc…) and wonder how I can be so upset over my two cats.  The fact is, an animal’s comfort is unique.  My time with them was a great way to decompress after dealing with certain harsh realities.  When the stress became too much to bear, a sweet little cat would come walking up my chest to remind me that for this moment, there is peace.  It was a gift which I never took for granted.  There is mounting evidence about the health benefits of pet ownership but any animal lover is not surprised by this information.  The bond we feel with our pets is profound.  At this stage in the grieving process, I am looking for silver linings… for lessons learned…for a way to acknowledge their memories.  Since I am a dancer, it is no surprise that I want to honor these memories while doing the thing I love the most.

My first performance after Willa died was very emotional.  My friends and students came with me, knowing I might need some extra support.  I dedicated my dance to her and asked her to please share some of her grace and her confidence.  When Willa inspires my movements, they are both delicate and feminine.  But Willa was also a great reminder that something can be small and have a commanding presence at the same time. I love to play with this concept when I dance and feel myself become taller.

Since losing Satchmo, I have thought about the vulnerability it takes to be a performer.  It takes a lot of courage to approach an audience with an open heart like my fellow dancers and I do all the time.  We risk rejection.  Sometimes we convert an uptight stick in the mud into a bellydance enthusiast, other times we are not as lucky.  In any case, when I think of Satchmo, it reminds me to take that leap of faith with my audience.  On some nights, it may seem easier to plaster on a smile and look past people, disconnected from their reaction.  Satchmo’s lesson is to always dance with heart.  Last night, I attended a bellydance show at Drom.  Some of the dancers hopped off the stage into the audience for a song.  I watched them scan the crowd for that friendly face that beams with the opportunity to share a moment with beautiful dancer.  It only takes one smile to make it all worthwhile.

Lastly, I want to thank my friends and family for helping me through this.  I have experienced death and loss before, and I assume I will again.  It is nice to know that I have your support along the way.  Thank you for the shoulders to cry on, the giggle fits, the heart to heart chats at all hours, the empathy and the love.  These are the best silver linings I could hope for and I will always do the same for you.

With Willa’s grace and Satchmo’s heart, I’ll dance my way through this.

Rest in peace Willa and Satchmo…

The Lost Art of Practice – Part I

Every so often, a new student says to me,  “How long will it take me to learn this move?” Or, my personal favorite, “How many lessons do I need before I can perform?” What I often say is that this dance comes with a unique skill set.  We move one part of our body while keeping everything else still, we learn the moves and then learn how to make them appear effortless, we have range of motion in places where many people do not.  This takes time.  Furthermore, we have to learn a certain amount of cultural information to know the appropriateness of certain styles in various settings.  Then, we learn how to add expression and become performers, rather than just dancers.

Tava teaching students at Studio 44

Not too long ago, I read Malcolm Gladwell’s book, “Outliers.”  In this book, he mentions that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to achieve mastery of a skill.  If we are to assume that half of that is sufficient for performing as a bellydancer, that would mean 2 hours a day of practice for more than 6 years.   This is not meant as a judgement of those who perform/teach without their 10,000 hours and, to some extent, maybe the effectiveness of those 10,000 hours depends on factors such as quality of instruction, type of practice, and age.

So, assuming a student wants to achieve a level of mastery, and it may not be practical for him/her to attend classes 3 hours per day, how can I (as their teacher) foster the interest in non-supervised practice?  I know full well that I have a number of students that want to move on to advanced level classes and perform, and a much smaller number of students who spend hours a day practicing.  The most obvious source of this difference is amount of time in a day that isn’t spent at work, raising children, running errands, etc.  It is hard for a mother, particularly of small children, to devote hours a day towards practice.  But I know there are some who put their kids to bed and do shimmy drills, record themselves doing combinations, or just improvise to a song or two before they go to sleep.  When I have a student who tells me they were practicing, it warms my heart and makes me so proud especially when I know how busy their lives are.

I believe there is a point in a dancers’ development where they are in limbo.  Clearly not beginners, but not necessarily progressing to an advanced level.  These dancers have a choice, enjoy weekly classes where they stay at the same level of ability but just enjoy the experience of moving and being around fellow students.  Or, step up their amount of practice hours and decide they want to achieve mastery.  There is nothing wrong with either route but I think it should be a conscious choice.  Weekly classes for 5-6 years, does not lead to significant improvement in technique, musicality, flexibility, or performance skills, but they can lead a sense of joy, comradarie, and gentle exercise.  Finding that student who is hungry for challenges, is dedicated, willing to sacrifice time with friends/family, and devote limited finances to costuming and continued training, is like the Holy Grail for teachers.  On the other hand, I was speaking with NYC Bellydancer, Sira, about how rewarding it is to teach students that are not in competition with each other to become professionals.  Both have their value.

Students practicing veil with Tava

I started to think, what can I do to help my students enjoy the experience of practice?   Having passed 10,000 hours of bellydancing, where did my motivation come from?  I will explore this in Part II of this blog but in the meantime, I’d love to hear from you about your own journeys.  It might help current and prospective students to read what motivated other dancers.

Photoshoot with Bill Winters

It starts several days before.  I make sure I am eating well, properly hydrated, and schedule extra time to sleep in the morning.  I lay out all of my costumes and accessories in separate garment bags, filling two suitcases worth of props, hair flowers, makeup, veils, etc.  The morning of the shoot, I am well rested and take the dog on a long walk to wake up and get the blood flowing.  Breakfast, which I am too excited to eat, becomes a bit forced but I do my best.  I listen to my favorite music on the car ride to Bill and Aleksandra’s house, and arrive in a delicious mood.

Bill and Aleksandra Winters are a couple with many talents.  He, a sought-after Cinematographer who circles the globe on a regular basis.  She, an amazing artist and art teacher (her paintings are currently on display at Zitoune Restaurant in Mamaroneck, NY).  When I arrive at their house, Bill has already packed the car with camera lenses, ladders, and more “tools” that I don’t understand…all designed to help me look good I assume.  Aleksandra has a bag full of additional props that I hadn’t thought to bring.  She has masks, fan veils, another sword, jewelry and more.  Furthermore, she has packed snacks and coconut water to keep us fueled.  I think to myself, how did I get so lucky?  Bill tells me he has mapped out the day and scouted the locations to determine how much time we have in each place.  Immediately, we get to work (after a few moments of adoring their beautiful cats).

Location 1: A beautiful park in Tarrytown.

The leaves are in full color and it’s remarkably warm for November (in the 60′s)!  Bill has decided that I should wear red to contrast the yellow in the leaves and Aleksandra convinces me to be more bold with my color choice for props.  I tell her purple, teal and gold fanveils won’t match my red costume.  She says in her adorable Polish accent, “Trust me.  Don’t worry about matching.”  Here is the result:

Copyright: William Winters

I am in awe of how the colors have come to life and blended with the beautiful Fall colors around us.  The light, the breeze, the shadows, everything just worked.  I decide that smiling is not the way I want to go with these shots.  I take on a different persona, inspired by the environment, and adjust the body lines/pose to reflect a quiet but empowered confidence.  Aleksandra is bouncing the light perfectly, and  Bill is hiking, contorting his body, crouching in bushes, anything and everything to get that perfect angle.

Location 2: Croton Reservoir

Here Bill has scouted 3 spots for their unique beauty and has decided I should wear the fuchsia/gold costume to pick up on the colors around us.  We first shoot in front of the dam, with it’s high white walls.  He uses a wide lens for a very cool effect and shoots on his stomach, (thank you for making me appear so tall).  I decide I want to pose with my Riq for it’s beautiful simplicity and round shape to contrast the heavy wall.  Here is a behind the scenes photo of Bill in action:

behind the scenes photo of Bill in action (taken with Aleksandra's cell phone)

Next we walk down to the water which is so beautiful I can hardly concentrate.  By now, a small crowd has gathered on the bridge above to watch.  I am not dressed for hiking so Aleksandra loans me her boots and they both take great care in guiding me down a hill on slippery rocks to make sure I don’t fall.  I feel like I’m made of porcelain and they are made of steel.  Clearly, they do this sort of thing more than I do and I turn brave for the sake of getting the right shot.  It was quite a sight, a $1,000 costume with hiking boots and the skirt held up in my arms so I don’t trip.  Here, magic happens.  The wind seems to take us under its’ wings and say, “I see what you’re going for, let me help you.”  Here is the outcome:

Copyright: William Winters

Aleksandra is there to advise me on whether or not the hair has blown into my face, bounce the light accordingly, while Bill is balancing on equally slippery rocks to get these shots.  When we hike back up the hill, I am wishing my husband could have seen this.  He is used to me staying on the path and not taking such risks and I know he would have gotten a kick out of seeing us all by the waterfall.  I am getting tired, but smiling the whole way to the next location, beaming with gratitude for the day so far.

Location 3: The beach

Bill told me that the sunset would be perfect for my turquoise costume and he was (no surprise), 100% right.  I change in the car, under a fort of coats, and Aleksandra loans me a beautiful necklace and veil for these shots.    We are losing the light, but gaining something very special.  Silhouettes are happening and I am getting a 3rd wind just playing in the sand, enjoying the breeze, even though it’s freezing by now.  I decide what my “character” is for this location and somehow this one feels like I’m on the set of a movie.  The photos start out as playful and become more meditative as we lose more and more light.  Here is one of my favorites:

Copyright: William Winters

We have developed a tradition of Chinese food post photo-shoot and we were full of aches, fatigue, sand in our shoes, goose poop on clothes, but very happy with what we created.  Bill and Aleksandra are amazing people and I love us as a team.  Each brings a brand of artistry, and we eat our Chinese food mostly in silence …partly because we are starving and partly because we’ve said everything that there was to say to each other during our full day.  After we eat, we sip tea and pull up the shots on Bill’s computer.  There are so many, more than 1,000.  We pick our favorite 75 and call it a day.  I drive home, pet my animals, hug my sleeping husband, and drift off very satisfied.  I hope you enjoy these photos as much as I enjoyed taking them.  My hope is that people will see bellydance in a beautiful environment and shed any negative stereotypes that linger about this dance.  It is empowering, beautiful, and ancient.  My colleagues continue to raise the bar with how they showcase this dance in photos and video clips, and I want to do my part as well.

Bill, you rock.  Aleksandra, thank you for all of your awesome help.  Thank you both for being such amazing friends.

Here are more from the shoot:

Copyright: William Winters

 

Copyright: William Winters

Reflections

Aaaaahhhh Sunday night.  A time for the hair to go up, maybe don a mud-mask, have glass of wine, and listen to the easy sounds of a snoring dog and purring cats.  Sometimes, it’s hard to calm down from the adrenaline of a non-stop week-end and I find myself re-playing the events from  my week, especially Thurs to Sat nights.   By the time I finish teaching my 2nd class on Sunday, I am ready for a big meal and a major dose of self care.  More often than not, I smile to myself and think, “I can’t believe I get paid to do this.”

Well, this past week-end was no exception.  It was full of performances that had me beaming ear to ear (even spent time with a beautiful woman – 8 months pregnant undulating and shimmying with such ease and grace).  My students made marked progress with a move we had been working on for weeks and then really got into the Ayoub for our rhythm awareness section.  Adding to the joy fest, I sold one of my most cherished costumes to a long-time student and felt that warmth of knowing that my lilac Sim will add elegance to many future performances for a young and talented dancer.  I ended this week-end like I end many week-ends – physically exhausted but supremely satisfied.

Tonight, while going through the mental highlight reel of the past few days, I began to wonder, what “feeds” me the most?  Is it the actual dance or the situations/experiences that the dance affords me?  Is it the sensation of the movements or the dear people I get to share it with in my classes and at shows?  Am I enjoying the physical act of dance more or less than being with fellow dancers that have become close and loyal friends?  In a nutshell, the movements initially felt foreign, exciting, feminine, and they helped me feel confident.  Now that I have been doing them since the late 90′s, (although not seriously until 2000), I feel like they are so much a part of me that I don’t necessarily “feel different” when I dance.  I wasn’t sure if this was a good conclusion or not so I decided to do something about it.

I put on a costume, played the classic music that I love (no techno beats or fusion here), and danced for myself.  No audience, no students, and not for the sake of practicing or rehearsing.  Yes, I was exhausted, but as the music took over, I no longer felt tired.  I felt that the dance became like food.  I realized how I loved the feeling of pointing my toes, adding graceful wrist flourishes and sharp percussive accents.  At the end of the day, I really do love this dance and hope that I continue to carve out time to just move to music for no reason other than to enjoy it.  Sure, I  take private lessons and workshops but that is for the sake of learning.  To dance without a goal is an important part of being a dancer.  Once we become teachers and performers, it is often the first thing to go.  So, like any good relationship it takes commitment.

Now it really is time for that glass of wine and an old movie.

Balance and Bellydance

If you’re a dancer who incorporates sword, shamadan or candle tray balancing into your performance, you’ve probably heard the popular question, “HOW do you DO that?”  I remember watching these performances when I was a bellydance newbie and thinking I would never get to the point where I could comfortably achieve this.  One day my teacher informed us that we were going to learn a choreography with tray.  I bought one, and was discouraged beyond belief when I started to practice.  In our balancing drills, my tray would bang on the floor with a crash.  I concentrated so hard that my face looked ridiculous.  I didn’t perform the choreography and felt like there was some secret I was missing to make this happen.  In the end, I learned that there is no “secret” other than lots and lots of regular practice.  Perhaps this came easier for other dancers but I really struggled to learn.  Furthermore, the skill required for each prop is slightly different.  Swords can have a side to side wobble, tray can have a back and forth wobble, you might need to keep your chin more or less lifted depending on how it sits on your head.  There is a lot to consider.

As I teach these skills to my students, I can see that while balancing may come easier to some, the look of concentration is really hard to shed.  The eyes do, to some extent, become fixed on a point which can lead to a frozen smile or a tough expression.  Getting the face to relax is the hardest part.  We don’t need to have a Bill Cosby rubber face while we dance, but it’s important to make the concentration look more like confidence than fear.  Believe me, the audience can tell if you’re feeling regal and majestic with burning candles on your head, or if you’re secretly just praying the whole time that you don’t drop it.

Tava with sword at Bi-Annual Evening of Bellydance

Tips:

-Try yawning with something on your head before you dance.  It will relax your face. . .and the rest of you.

-You might want to practice on carpet or a yoga mat to protect your floors.

-Practice leaning forward, back and sideways to get your neck to experience flexion and extension in both planes.

-Make sure to practice level changes in a skirt which can tangle in you feet when you get up.  You cannot look down to clear it so you have to get used to using peripheral vision.

-If you feel a wobble coming don’t stop dancing.  Take your prop off your head with purpose (like you meant to do so all along) and either balance it somewhere else or hold it in your hand while you spin.  Place it again, carefully.

- You don’t need to keep any prop on your head the entire time. ..it might even get boring depending on what you are doing.  I love when I see dancers present their prop, connect with it, balance it for a while and and then move it somewhere else.  Obviously, this is not the case with shamadan.  Once you have a flaming candelabra on your head it’s exciting enough to keep it there.

- Lastly, I like to keep tension at the top of my head.  In other words, I press up into the prop (actively) rather than letting it weigh down on my head.

I still have the occasional “uh oh” moment (shhh…don’t tell) but I love dancing with my balancing props.  I need to find a song that really moves me and get lost in the character.  I love watching the faces of the audience and find it empowering.  Here is a clip where I get a little stuck in my skirt as I try to get up without knocking into my videographer.  I was so in the moment that the end of the song took me by surprise.  I wanted more time but that is why practice is important.  I don’t mind using myself as an example.  Note: be careful when practicing balancing on the chin.  It can hurt the neck to be in extension that deep or fly off while you’re spinning.  Take balancing very seriously and practice at your own skill level.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RckzzOT840o

Have fun practicing!

-

Bellydancers and a Jazz Trio

Bellydancers and musicians are a very likely pairing, as evidenced by many of us earning our livings together.  Where would we be without the talents of our doumbek, oud, violin, riq, clarinet and qanun players?  Even as the homogenous sounds of pop music spread across the globe, we still have a need and a respect for the sound of actual instruments. . .hopefully.   Now let’s stretch that concept to include joining forces with a jazz trio who excels at playing rock/metal tunes in melodic jazzy arrangements that tickle the brain into thinking, “Where do I know that song?  Oh yeah…It’s Metallica!”  Well, let me offer you some context as to how this came to be.

A while back, my husband and I went to see my dance partner and friend, Kazja, perform at a local NY spot.  There was a group of us sitting together, including guitarist Alex Skolnick (primarily of Testament fame but with a lengthy resume of musical accomplishments).  Kazja, in her charming way, had everyone in our group up to dance with her during her set.  My husband handles this in one of two ways: sheer determination to stay in his seat, or with reckless abandon that showcases every bellydance skill he has managed to pick up in 12 years of watching me.  On this night, he chose the latter.  Alex respected the process of being “beckoned” to dance and contributed fairly, but it appeared that the experience got his mental wheels spinning.  A few months later, he hatched an idea to shoot a music video which involved three bellydancers and members of The Alex Skolnick Trio sharing a wall at a rehearsal space.  Furthermore, it  would pay  homage to the classic Run DMC/Aerosmoth video for “Walk This Way.”  For more on how the concept came to light, click here for the article in Guitar World which released the video earlier this month.

Adding further interest to the video, each dancer had what can only be described as a doppelganger musician.  The lovely Erica Joan shared the infamous grey streak with Alex, Kazja and Matt Zebroski are the Polish blondes, and Nathan Peck and I shared dark curly hair and glasses.  Ahh yes.  The glasses.  Fully willing to pour myself into the artistic needs of the video and don bifocals from Staples to clarify the point that Nathan was my match, the magnification was so strong that I could not see out of them.  It appeared that when I wore them, the floor was about 2 feet higher than normal.  My eyes looked googly and large so we compromised by having me wear them mostly on the top of my head, or looking down when they were on. I still have them as a proud souvenir.

photo by Francine Grillo

The song for the video “Bollywood Jam” is an interesting blend of jazz, rock, and a hauntingly beautiful melody which has an Indian flavor.  It was an easy vehicle for showcasing the fluid and delicate movements of bellydance as well as the strong percussive accents.  The chemistry between the dancers was something I will always cherish.  No attitudes.  No drama.  It was a joy to be a part of a collaborative team of people who were all working for the best outcome.  The band members were respectful and easy to work with, Kevin Mackall provided guidance that was easy to follow for each scene, and the crew worked tirelessly to get the right camera angles, build and take down a set, etc.  I never grow tired of bearing witness to something that starts as an idea, and a million details, meetings, rehearsals, and edits later, it becomes a reality.

In the end, I feel that it’s a beautiful pairing of two brands of artistry.  The dancers and I would never have allowed ourselves to be video eye candy flipping our hair at the knees of our doppelgangers or locked in a cage like bellydancing prisoners.  It was clear that Alex, Matt and Nate were not going for that either.  The best part of my job is the variety it affords me and whether I’m bellydancing to spoken word poetry, shaking my hips for charity, recording finger cymbals to be used for a song, or dancing with a jazz trio, it keeps me grateful for my decision to pursue dance as a career.  I sometimes have my doubts, but it’s nice to have these moments where I know I am exactly where I need to be.  After years of being a career counselor at a music and art university, the decision to take my own advice was a big one.

Here’s the video folks. “Bollywood Jam” from the CD Veritas.  Enjoy!

For more on The Alex Skolnick Trio: http://www.alexskolnick.com/alex-skolnick-trio/

The Restaurant Audience that Just Wants to Eat

For starters, I’m going to make certain that this blog doesn’t turn into a rant.  I’ll save the ranting for a phone chat with a dancer buddy and try to keep this more informative.  This post will continue with my recent trend of writing about audience/performance experience.  We’ve all had those nights where the diners at our restaurant shows are simply not interested in watching our performance.  They want to eat in peace and catch up with their friends, husbands, business associates, etc.  It is nothing personal, but it can leave even the seasoned dancer feeling a bit frustrated.   The best performances are those that involve a shared experience between audience and dancer, and that “give and take” creates the magic that is unique to restaurant/club shows vs. the staged or theater shows.  When the dancers feel that they are merely dancing for themselves, it is easy to slip into routine moves and let the mind wander to other things.  I’d like to share my thoughts on both sides of this issue.  What can restaurants/bars do to prevent this “bellydance disinterest” and foster enthusiasm for the performance?  And also, what can we, as dancers, do to make the most of these nights that feel like paid practice time?

On average, I usually find the one or two tables that are not into watching my show and focus on all the other friendly faces.  Very often, it is hard not to get caught up in the euphoria of the experience and even those who were hard-lipped find themselves smiling and clapping.   The counseling/psychology background makes me very interested in this phenomenon of the shifting experience and how emotions can be contagious.   A sincere expression of joy is infectious, just as someone in a bad mood can bring others down with them.  We cannot force this, but emotion that is “canned” doesn’t have the same impact so dancing for a non-appreciative audience means it requires more work on the part of the dancer to exude charm, charisma, humor, etc…  This is sometimes refered to as emotional contagion. 

So, how can restaurants/clubs foster the more positive emotional experience for both dancer and audience?  For starters, diners should not be surprised when the music starts, finger cymbals clang, and dancer emerges.  It should be promoted on the restaurants websites, an easily visible poster stating when the dancer is performing,  and on their social networking posts.  This will promote bellydance for those who want to experience it, and allows people the option to avoid the show if they want to have a quiet family meal.  Secondly, one of the restaurants where I often do monthly shows, Xenia Taverna, creates a special bellydance night.  There is a special prix fixe meal, the staff wears hip scarves, they dim the lights just before I dance and the restaurant owner always starts the clapping, cheering. . .and the tipping.   I also have to credit Zitoune for their wonderful job promoting our Thursday bellydance night with their e-newsletter, website, and word of mouth to their customers.  They offer incentives for people to come like drink and appetizer specials.  I often see the owner clapping, and even getting up to show off a few of his own moves.  Having the support of these restaurants  ensures that people are coming for the performance and that’s better for everyone.

Now shifting gears to what we, as dancers, can do.   Keep your emotions authentic.  It is our job to really feel longing, excitement, introspection, joy or whatever else the music calls for.  If we’re gritting our teeth and feeling P O’d  that nobody is watching, we’re making it harder on ourselves.  Maybe this means you have to change your music more often to keep it fresh, or buy a new costume that makes you feel fabulous!  Last night with my advanced class, we reviewed “the art of getting people up to dance.”  This is such a subtle process and if you come on too strong, the “rejection” can be very obvious.  Some people are just dying to get up and dance and that is great but other people need coaxing.  I like to look at people in a very coy way, drop my chin and approach slowly.   I may shimmy around them and then whisper in their ear as I request their hand, “don’t worry, I’ll show you exactly what to do.”  Some people need to copy your moves so keep it basic.  It’s not a great time to do all of your tricks.  I will teach them a basic move and then give them verbal encouragement while they are dancing with me.   Lastly, look for the kids.   Children can be a great way to convert a stubborn audience because who doesn’t want to see an adorable child dance?  Kids are natural performers and they love being draped in a veil and dancing like a princess.   Staged shows are, in a sense, easier because you’re not relying on the give and take as much but that means you’ve got to fill that stage with talent, strong presence and be prepared to wow.  Here’s an old blog about the differences between restaurants, private homes and theater performances: http://dancingtava.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=245&action=edit

And lastly, none of this works without audience at all.  Please do your best to support bellydance.  If you are a student, it is especially important to go and support your teacher or see someone you don’t know to watch a style other than your teacher’s.  Make sure you clap, tip, smile and share in the emotional contagion to keep the night happy.

Knowing Your Audience

Yesterday, I performed at a birthday party which was held at Zitoune Restaurant.  A large group of joyful Lebanese women hopped to their feet the moment they heard the first ring of my finger cymbals.  All of them in dresses, high heels and eyes painted smokey, they exuded femininity and confidence.  They left their tables and made a circle around me while clapping, cheering and dancing with me.  They felt the music, swayed their experienced hips, and thanked me with a generous amount of ”greenbacks.”   What can be better than gigs like this?

Later on, while I was enjoying my delicious meal from Zitoune’s new summer menu, I thought about how different my experience was a few days earlier.  I danced at a charity event for a largely American audience and, while I had a terrific time and enjoyed performing for them, I could tell it was a foreign experience for most of them.   Their ears were taking in the Arabic music, the women seemed a bit surprised and comforted that I directed my attention toward them rather than toward the men, and a few of them eyed my costume suspiciously, unsure if they were comfortable with an exposed abdomen and the slit on my skirt.  My objective was to “convert” them and make this audience fans of bellydance.  I wanted to help them shed the stereotype and view me as the “facilitator of joy” that I always hope to be.   In the end, I was pleased with the outcome and was grateful to see their smiling faces.  Whew.  I don’t always leave feeling victorious.  My fellow dancers and I have shared stories with each other about either winning over or striking out with a tough crowd.  I give the American audiences a great deal of credit for opening themselves to a new experience.  One of my most rewarding performances was  for an all American audience at an upscale country club with small tables scattered around the dance floor.  I was “advised” not to get anybody up to dance with me because the guests were uncomfortable.  By the end of the night, I received so many thank you’s and hugs.  I was moved to near tears by the heartfelt appreciation and humbled by the experience.  You really never know what’s going to happen when the music starts.

Here are some things that I do if I know I am dancing for a predominately non-Arabic crowd:

-music is mostly 4/4 or rhythm that is easy to follow.  No oddly timed rhythms that will trip people up if they try to dance. 

-women and children first.  Once the women understand my role, I may go for the exuberant Uncle and use toungue and cheek humor when getting men up to dance

-props that showcase technical skill like balancing sword or candle tray.  They are crowd pleasers.

-demonstate simple movements (mini-lesson) for the people I pull up to dance with me.  There is nothing worse than standing there trying to dance in a completely different way in front of a room full of people.  Giving them a few “moves” for guidance and encouragement helps.

A Bellydancer’s Fee

I’m beginning to notice a trend that I write financial-related posts during tax season.  It’s certainly no coincidence that I have numbers on the mind after writing what felt like a hefty check to Uncle Sam.   Like many bellydancers I know, I equate major expenses with the number of costumes I could have purchased with that money.  It’s a fact I’m not proud of, but I’m human and not without flaw. 

Lately, I’ve noticed an increase in the number of private gig inquiries I’m receiving.  In an effort NOT to over-book myself, I no longer feel compelled to say yes to everything.  If I’m already dancing at a wedding, for example, I don’t accept another performance on the same night.  Having recently danced myself to a state of pneumonia, it was a wake up call to recognize my limits.  It also means I get to refer gigs to my colleagues and I love to support my community of dancers in this way.  It pays not to hoard because people do return the favor and it’s nice to be on the receiving end of referrals when you need them.

Since private gigs generally pay two to three times what the restaurant gigs pay, I handle them with care from initial booking to post event follow up.  I have multiple conversations with my “clients” to be sure I meet their needs as best I can.  On rare occasions, I also meet with a client before an event to do what my production manager husband would call a “walk through.”  This may entail looking at the space where I will perform and figuring out if there’s room for wings or if it is a good environment for candle tray.  I determine if my music should be on CD or ipod, and in some cases, gather my musician friends if the client springs for live music.  This also includes choosing music that is culturally and lyrically appropriate.  On the day of the performance, I spend over an hour getting ready, choosing a costume that best fits the occasion, and matching a color preference whenever possible.  I have my music (which also includes a back up CD or playlist on a separate ipod in case of any technological malfunctions).  I leave plenty of extra time in case there is traffic and make sure that I am dressed as a professional if I don’t arrive in costume. 

During the performance, I give it my all.  100% of my attention and passion to ensure that the guests are having a great time and are a part of the show to the extent they want to be.  It doesn’t matter if I’m tired, hungry, getting frizzy hair from being outdoors in the summer, or even sick.  After the show, I budget time to pose for photos with families and thank the DJ or whomever helps me with my music.  Sometimes, people insist that I stay and “have cake” or join a family in singing “Happy Birthday.”  When I feel inclined and have the time, I do stay.   And lastly, I generally call or email a day or two after the event to thank my “client.” 

So, when somebody calls and asks me how much I charge to dance for 15 minutes, it’s important that they understand it is more than 15 minutes of work.  By and large, you get what you pay for.  A 15 minute set can mean different things for different people.  There are countless threads about this on Bhuz.com and lots of information on standard rates for different areas.  I believe that part of a professional bellydancer’s job is to educate people about what a dancer does beforehand, during and after  a show to warrant his/her fee.  Many of us work without health benefits, have expensive costumes that can only look new for a limited amount of time, we have additional expenses for make-up and accessories, travel costs (whether gas or paying for a driver), not to mention how we push our bodies to remain flexible and maintain our stamina.  We do this because we love our craft, but some of us also earn our living this way.  My intention is not to rant, but merely to help people understand why we charge what we do.  I am lucky to work with people who don’t bat an eye at my rate and know that it is fair.  Every now and then, however, I have to educate people about why I charge what I do and if they “get it” then they hire me.  If they don’t, that’s fine too.

For reference, many dancers in NY/CT charge between $200 and $350 for a 20 to 30 minute set.  For me, this rate depends on length of set, travel time, holiday, etc.  There are dancers who charge more, and generally they are very sought-after and can justify charging a higher rate because their experience/ability most likely warrants it.  Most everybody has a website or public facebook page where you can see video clips, photos, read their bio, etc…  My advice is for people interested in hiring a bellydancer to make an informed choice and choose a dancer based on more than just appearance.  

Happy dancing everyone!

Veil Control

Ahhh the veil.  So beautiful the way it floats in the air and frames the body.  What other prop can create a silky vortex with spins and add oodles of drama with just a flick of the wrist?  Dancing with veil is my favorite prop experience because it just begs for emotional connection.  That being said, it can be a very uncooperative partner when you’re getting started.   One of my Manipura gals, Starlet, recently told me it’s the hardest prop for her because you have the least amount of control over it.  This got me thinking.  Zills, put them on your fingers and hope your elastic is tight enough.  Balancing props stay where you put them (hopefully).  With veil, however, you can intend to do certain moves but the air current might have other plans for your silky partner.   It can slip out of your fingers or get stuck on your head.  So, what exactly is the role of perceived “control” in our dance?

Part of why I love the veil is because it forces me to be out of control and in the moment.  It fosters musicality with a push or a pull on the melody with 3 to 4 yards of silk, which has more impact than plain arms.  Sometimes the mistakes yield better results than what I may have intended to do.  Of course, there have been times when my veil and I have had a public argument about what I wanted it to do and what it actually did.  Fortunately, those occurrences have become more and more rare as I’ve handed over equal control to my silk partner.  I have gotten better about getting out of my head when I dance with veil.  I don’t really make plans with it, which can lead to disappointment when those plans don’t pan out.  Sure I might decide on the fly that I want to do a “trick” where I toss it and catch it but if it doesn’t work out, then it’s not a loss.  It’s an opportunity to let the veil take the lead.

When we’re talking about expressive veil, it’s important to remember that this is not like the Egyptian entrance with veil where it is faster and tossed before the song is over.  Faster veil work, which is also beautiful, does require more control of the veil and makes accident recovery a bit more difficult.  Take a look at this clip of an entrance by a dancer named Aleya performing Egyptian Oriental dance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iBYlGMNzqk.  Now take a look at this clip of NYC based dancer Mariyah with veil: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFHYJB7vWVk&feature=related.  In the first clip, the veil is used to make an entrance more exciting.  In the 2nd clip, the veil is used for an entire song and adds drama to a slower piece of music.  Dancers should experiment with both of these styles and I’ve even seen some performers do both in the same show.  They will come out with a chiffon blend (heavier) veil for 30 seconds of an entrance, toss it and continue with their fast entrance song.  Then, a slower rhumba for their 2nd song with expressive veil.

When you’re dancing in the Cabaret style and you want a slow luxurious veil experience, just remember that it’s not about hitting a beat and filling a song with your tricks.  You can do those things but you should give the silk time to breathe in between.  An air vent might be nearby.  It might be caught on your hip belt.  You might even drop it.  Practice with those mistakes so that you can work with it and not reveal your inner stress or disappointment.  Learn  blend the “mistake” into something else that you might enjoy even more.  Ask yourself if you’d like to watch a dancer control her veil or see her experience a song with her veil (once again, not applicable to a fast veil entrance).  Sure, sometimes my nerves get the best of me and it’s not always the veil magic I’m looking for so if the stakes are high, I choreograph sections and leave a bit less room for improv.  That being said, I practice it enough so that I know how to work my way out of a veil mis-hap. 

I also recommend having a veil that you love.  Find the right weight, length, shape, rolled hem/no hem, etc…  I have become a huge fan of www.silkdancer.com where I can choose all of these options and have them dyed to perfectly match a costume.  I’m also thankful to have been influenced by Andrea, Elena Lentini and Aszmara who have taught me the joys of connecting with silk on an emotional level.